High Sierra Topix

sekihiker wrote: ↑Mon Nov 18, 2019 9:13 pm

markskor wrote: ↑Thu Sep 15, 2011 9:09 pm Maybe naïve or lucky, but never had any problem reading anyone in the backcountry, especially miles back. More than one day in, you can generally tell in just a few seconds who wants to chat and who wants solitude…OK with both.

I couldn't have said it better. Even from a distance, I try to sense whether someone else would welcome contact just by looking at body language. Often the body language indicates no, so I try to stay out of view.

Generally true, but I've also run into a couple of folks deep in the back country who seemed oblivious to the fact that my wife and I wanted to enjoy the space and wilderness on our own---and didn't want a hiking companion for a few hours or more. Despite the fact that they had chosen to hike solo, they were clearly anxious to join our party of two for a while. In one case, we simply had to find a way to separate ourselves from him.

Not everyone has the ability (or perhaps never taught when growing up) to read body language or pick up social ques. I have a few backpacking friends who are very "chatty" when they meet people. They actually think I am unfriendly; I on the other hand, cringe at their intrusiveness into someone else's space. In fact I have a family member who is a bit on the Asperger side- runs down a rabbit hole with endless tedious technical details as my eyes glaze over and never gets it!

I find the best method is to simply say, "have a nice trip, but I have to leave and prefer to hike alone". Maybe blunt, but people who do not pick up on your body language may actually need (and appreciate) a direct message. These hikers may be hiking solo because few people have the patience to tolerate them, not because they want solitude! Anyway, I try to remain kind but firm in not wanting them to join me.

Nice post, Daisy.

Like many a well-seasoned "soloists" here, consider myself a irascible, set-in-my-ways, say what I want, solitary, dirt bag. Maybe a bit slower than I once was, but still quickly able to react to any unfavorable situation encountered...no problem packing up and heading down the trail - anytime.
Also agree with WD above, why not just speak up? Is there anything wrong with just telling a complete stranger that you desire to hike/camp alone?

“Do you hate people?”

“I don't hate them...I just feel better when they're not around.”
― Charles Bukowski, Barfly

I always talked to people a lot for a BPer - me.
I hiked about 80-90 days of trips almost intirely alone.
I obviously liked to go Cross Country so at times went days without seeing anyone.
I never wanted to go alone but if I had time to go and no one to go with I went anyway.

I could usually tell if someone would welcome company by how they looked at me. If they do not look at me for more that 1 second they probably do not want to talk to me.